To make a long story short (too late)

Part III

I hate to call this Part III like it's turning into some B flick horror story. It was a little dramatic if only because of the crazy chain of events and perfect storm of confusion. I wasn't trying to turn my life into an episode of mystery diagnosis. It just kind of happened.

I was taking my temperature multiple times throughout the day as I was fading away. Everyone was concerned for my well-being, asking me if I had eaten. I usually hadn't, but I was too focused on trying to do my job that I wasn't thinking about anything else. I was worried, but I didn't know any more than the doctors, so what could I do? I tried not to let it show and I think I was fairly successful at that. However, I was never quite sure if pushing ahead like business as usual made me appear stupid or strong.

I was out of work twice over those nearly four months and that only made me crazier because I didn't have the energy to do anything. I'm not accustomed to being the center of attention, not comfortable at all with it, but for those few months, I was in the spotlight. I got a lot more attention than I was used for quite a while after that.When I got my diagnosis of Classic Hodgkin's Lymphoma, I was ready.

I never thought I was going to die. Somehow that surprised a lot of people. I still have this one vendor that I see from time to time that tells me that I'm an inspiration. I never ever considered that outcome. But everyone around me, whether they shared it aloud or not, was very upset at the prognosis of a battle with Cancer.

My wife and daughter kept it to themselves but were very worried about losing me. And yet, the woman who got so frustrated at my lack of concern for myself, got me to a hospital and finally got doctors to see that I was actually sick, was upset that I was willing to jump into treatment so quickly. I had my first Chemotherapy treatment four days before Christmas 2012.

Now that I've shared my story, that brings me to why I decided to retell it a couple of years later. Three of my friends on Facebook posted similar memes regarding the handling of personal adversity. Andrew has a knack for being concise, even in his posts. I've pasted his below.

For every action, there is a reaction

The nerds among you are recognizing this as Newton's 3rd law (which is actually more like, for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.) You could also call it the 1st Law of Facebook, but I digress. You might not be surprised how most people react to the "C" word. When I was younger, every one I knew that got Cancer died. Everyone. Times have changed.

Despite the fact that there is no cure for Cancer (and we can discuss whatever conspiracy you believe to exist on another blog, but not this one) there are noticeably more survivors now then 30 years ago. I was diagnosed at Stage 3B with classic Hodgkin's Lymphoma. Technically I am in remission, because there is no cure, and it is likely that it will return later in my life. Given that I had developed Shingles in my early 30s, I would say it's a pretty darn good chance.

There were varying reactions, but we're going to focus on mine, which was, OK. Let's start treating this to fix my body. I never thought about dying. I just wanted to get the me I had known back. The me that competed in sprint distance triathlons, played soccer, was active with my kids in baseball and softball. To some of those around me, that was inspirational.

Nothing to see here...

I am human. I am fallible. I have defined myself more for my career, my work ethic, or my tenacity on the sports fields than anything else. I should be a better father and husband and define myself by family. But I have never considered myself a survivor. I was simply looking at the statistics.

Despite my body being attacked by Cancer, it took 4 months to be diagnosed, so my body was doing something to fight for itself. I had 12 Chemotherapy sessions. The fact that I had fluids introduced into my body that would have killed a healthy individual notwithstanding, I had a relatively easy time. I had no nausea. I had Chemo on Tuesdays and went to work on Wednesdays afterwards. I don't have a physical job so I was able to manage. And my Chemo was less than what others receive for treatment.

I just sat there. Each treatment lasted anywhere from two and half to four hours. I credit my Oncologist, Dr. Kotz and the wonderful nurses and staff at Cape Fear Cancer Specialists for taking care of me. The surgeon who installed and removed my port for treatments did more than I. So I just don't think of myself as a survivor. If calling me a survivor helps you to make it through that day, then that's your prerogative.

I would just as soon you call me Jon...the Incomplete Writer.