In the end...there was another beginning.

The reviews are in...

Well, last night's post (or this morning's post depending on your perceived reality) garnered a few comments. My wife read this when she woke up yesterday and liked it, but noted I had a few typos (which I think I have corrected by now) and said it wasn't like me; I must have been tired. True enough. One friend thought it was sad and I guess that's one way of looking at it, but I was viewing the more hopeful side of things. How oddly optimistic of me. But we ARE changing...constantly, as are our surroundings, the people, the circumstances in which we live and we move on, bettered for those experiences. Another friend was like, "Doctor Who is awesome." I agree. I appreciate all of you reading...all 3 of you. Please continue to enjoy and tell your friends.

Again, I was going to venture on another path and, by my calculations, I'm approximately 3 posts behind in my thoughts, which is infuriating to say the least. So, I'll write until I'm tired again, my brain will relax, and I can wake up tomorrow and try to get back on track.

The play's the thing

“All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances,
And one man in his time plays many parts" - William Shakespeare

Words that capture a sense of place and time, feelings, and where I am at...I guess what I'm trying to say here is that they're my spirituality. And yet, none of this is real. I am but a character, on this page on the world's stage. A character made up of actions and words going back 40 some odd years. Some good. Some bad. One built upon another, in some respect, a work of fiction slowly created over time. A story in the making.

But we make those things real. Each individual, their thoughts, actions, feelings, words, all become real, as real we BELIEVE them to be. In a way, I'm no more real than Sherlock Holmes, or Harry Potter, except in the manner in which I perceive myself and others perceive me. How deeply you believe determines the depth of your reality.

What do you believe?

If you believe that I was ever a part of a fight in the parking lot of a bar ("Time for a little warm up" - posted 8/23/15) then that was real to you. Good for me. Writer's job accomplished. I can make things seem real. That's what I always loved about acting when I was growing up. I could become that character, live in that moment and it became real.

I have always been able to make myself believe things by playing them out in my head...and then they became real. Have you ever had a conversation in your head before you actually had a face-to-face conversation with someone, only the conversation in person doesn't go the same way, yet you remember the conversation, not how it was, but some mutation of the actual event and the one that you played out in your head? It all becomes real, because you come to believe it. Then sometimes, real just happens, and you live in that moment, reality just whacks you over the head like a sledge hammer.

Where does that leave us?

Right now I'm in between everything is real, and nothing is real. I feel that everyone should believe in something...I believe I'll have another drink. I'm beginning to understand why many great writers were heavy drinkers.

So what is real? Perhaps we must look no further than The Velveteen Rabbit.

Maybe it's all real. But what would I know, I'm just an Incomplete Writer.

Life is...

I know what I said, but...

Life is just a really long roller coaster ride, full of ups and downs, twists and turns. Sometimes you even get turned upside down. Some parts last longer than others and some happen so fast that you almost forget about them.

I remember the first time I rode the Great American Scream Machine at Great Adventure (A Six Flags park for those of you who did not grow up in New Jersey.) At that time, it was the fastest looping coaster to date and reached speeds of almost 70 miles per hour as you plummeted into 3 loops, what they called a batwing (I preferred pretzel) and a double corkscrew. To this day, I still don't recall the 3rd loop. I was pretty much in shock that my friends dragged me on the thing in the first place and I was looking in the opposite direction as the initial drop caught me a little off guard. But that's life. There's always something unexpected around the corner.

So forgive me if we don't talk about Semantics today. I know I promised that we would. Let's not call it a lie. I just got a little sidetracked. In the routine of day-to-day living, it just seemed to be unimportant to tackle something so academic.

Please keep your hands inside the vehicle at all times

Every ride has rules and life is just the longest ride of them all. So as I progress in this blog which is just as much about life as it is about writing (since art does indeed imitate life) I have the ability to change the rules as I go.

I know I've spoken before about my M-spirations (bonus points if you can name them all) and how they spark the thoughts which enable me to write. Time's up. Got 'em? In no particular order: Music, movies, moments have all gotten me going at one point or another. I'm adding another: Memes.

The funny thing is, as I looked into memes, the origins of the word and the way in which it was first utilized, it plays right where I was heading with this post. As usual, I have skipped those steps somewhat and left you scratching your head. If we've ever conversed you know the frustration. But I digress.

Just a little spring cleaning

So, anyway...I had this epiphany. I know exactly when it happened because I was looking at my phone at the time. It was Wednesday, March 23rd at 9:03 am. And it's great that memes are so prevalent and they fall within the guidelines of my M-spirations because Doctor Who as movie, not so much, but many of the lines from the television episodes are fantastic, producing a number of equally fantastic memes. As difficult as it is to not share everything, I'll limit myself to three.

In Season 5, Episode 10 "Vincent and the Doctor" (and I think I've mentioned this episode before) had several great interactions and comments about life and living. But one stood out to me above all others.

I carry words with me everywhere, which is already spinning me into my next post, but we'll deal with this first. There will always be bumps in the road, but don't let go of the good things. That was my first thought. Then it led to that fact that life is in a constant state of change, nothing stays the same forever, including the people we are and the those who touch our lives, however brief that time may be. So now we back up to Season 2, Episode 3 "School Reunion," 10th Doctor now, but a line from Sarah Jane Smith:

I find I write better from pain and loss. The music that sparks the most energy, emotion, and therefore my writing, tends to be a little on the depressing or angry side. My wife asked that I listen to something a bit more positive, so I've been adjusting a little over the last few weeks, but I needed to get that feeling back so I have reverted as of late.

But those moments do define us, and you get to see how selfish or self-absorbed people are. Sadness is selfish. When we lose someone in our lives, through death, ending of a relationship, or those that just seem to fade away, the sadness we feel is selfish. The focus is on what and who WE will miss, and not appreciating the moments we had. Everything has a time a place. And everything ends.

Then we change. Which brings me to the last meme I will make you suffer through...today. Somewhere between Seasons 7 and 8, "The Time of the Doctor," aired on Christmas 2013, which puts us into the 11th Doctor, reminding us that we are always changing as well.

I know that I am a different person than I was a year ago. And before that I was a different person than the 2 years prior, and the year before that. Some of the changes were gradual, others were unexpected, sudden. But I remember...and I move onto the next person that I am going to be. Somewhere in there I will find my stories, clarify my voice...and make my mark. Sharing my knowledge, or entertaining, or allowing a reader to escape for a time...

I have been working at stepping outside my comfort zone lately. Nothing polished and most of it still bouncing around in my head. I have rough ideas, random thoughts, and pondered polishing off some old writings to revamp. But my life to this point has been more of Mr Toad's Wild Ride than Great American Scream Machine, so Kerouac or Hemingway I am not. But I will find my way from the place I'm in now, develop my stories to tell, maybe even embellish a little for effect. Everyone has a story to tell.

"But that's OK. We're all stories, in the end. Just make it a good one, eh? Because it was, you know, it was the best."

I know I promised no more memes, but I didn't promise no more quotes.That's from Doctor Who Season 5, Episode 13 "The Big Bang." I mean, really, have you come to expect anything less...from the Incomplete Writer?